essentialsaltes: (PWNED!!! by Science)
[personal profile] essentialsaltes
The current Skeptical Inquirer has an article by NASA's David Morrison. It makes one despair. It's mainly a collection of questions (published and unpublished) he's fielded as "Ask an Astrobiologist" relating to Nibiru, the Babylonian planet that will destroy all life on earth. Or it would if it existed.
(Of course, Nibiru is also the name of Ballard's band, which will destroy all life on earth.)

The article more or less starts with sane questions "Hey, I heard about this thing. Is it true?" and slowly descends through kookiness into madness, and ultimately descends into a level of madness only achievable in places like an AOL chatroom devoted to the authenticity and efficacy of the Simonomicon. A sampling (most errors sic):

I can't believe This!, you still have the gall to lie to the hole world about planetX Nibiru, How dare you do that, yet you keep on calling yourself a Senior Scientist, shame on you...

Sorry but you say Nibiru is a Hoax? Doesnt Exist? So maybe The Sumerian people doesnt exist also! ... It is talked about centurys ago in Sumerian Civilization. Stone Plates with the planet were found! Its possible to say that this planet giant orbit passes between Sun and Earth and causes the Glaciar Eras to happen. I talk about the facts!

The question isn't why are you lieing to the people about the exsistance of Nibiru, the question is do you think you will be spared when it's effects come to pass.

I think NASA is trying to cover up the up coming of planet X or Nibiru in year 2012. Is it because this world is over population and some of us need to die? Why is NASA being fishy about this?

Don't play stupid with me because you are obvisly not going to answer my question with truth not like its your fault but the goverments and higher powers.

I understand you don't want to loose [ARRGH! sic] your job. So I know your answer about Nibiru. You, Nasa, the USA government and whoever else will deny till it will be undeniable. Mankind is going to disappear and nothing will change this truth. I hope you couldnt live with this lie over your shoulders anymore.

I have read about the things all about nibiru, and i was completely shocked from this matter, but for many years untill now as i gazed towards the sky during at night, i have noticed a huge star beyond us, I would like to ask is that eris? because the size has dramtically increased over the lsat couple of years?

I hear that the beings who are on the Nibiru mother ship which houses smaller ships inside are coming to help the inhabitants of Earth to raise their polarity levels up so the plane would shift up to 4D. Have you heard about this? Please be honest. Theres a lot of information on YouTube that speaks about this...

I am an experimental physicist. I am currently working on anti-gravity technology. I have received an infra-red reading of an object travelling into our solar system. This lab does not contain any astrophysicists but we believe this object (around 1.2 times the size of Jupiter) is the new planet Nibiru (Planet X). Its orbit is highly elliptical and will pass into the inner-solar system. I would like to confirm a couple of things for me. Is this accurate -- Our facts are based on rumour, [emphasis mine] the scan is only a basic, find objects to test on scan. Does this object pose any danger to the Earth? Would any danger occur in a test of experimental technology to deviate the object from its current course? The generator we have created theoretically can move any object of any size, as mass should not affect the fields created.

At least this guy will be able to solve this non-existing problem with his non-existing anti-gravity generator. Won't he feel special when he averts this disaster!

Date: 2008-08-19 11:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dogofthefuture.livejournal.com
2012, eh? Is that because that's when the Mayan calendar ends, or is the amazing coincidence just totally blowing people's little minds? I mean, Nibiru is set to show up in 2012, the Sumerians said so, and here the Mayan calendar ends, I mean my GOD, how could you need any more proof that both the Mayans knew when the world would end, or that Nibiru will be the cause of destruction?

Date: 2008-08-19 11:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hagdirt.livejournal.com
Do you suppose a simple grammar/spellcheck could be used as a Batshit Detector, or am I just being an elitist again?

Date: 2008-08-20 12:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jimkeller.livejournal.com
Sadly, I know a few (relative) non-crazies with dyslexia whose writing isn't any better...

Date: 2008-08-20 02:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dustchick.livejournal.com
Did Morrison mention the earlier hysterics when Nibiru was supposed to hit us in 2003? It's the new date that cracks me up.

Date: 2008-08-21 05:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] essentialsaltes.livejournal.com
He mentions the 2003 foofarah, but that was before his stint as Ask a Smartiepants, so he doesn't spend much time on it.

Date: 2008-08-21 05:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dustchick.livejournal.com
I find it sad that people fall for the same things over and over again, like the "Mars will look bigger than the Moon" thing that's been coming around when Mars is at its brightest the past several years. Sigh - guess that's why I go back in the classroom on Monday!

Date: 2008-08-21 07:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] michaelar.livejournal.com
...

I didn't know there were still people like this. I wonder -- who are these people? Where do they live? What do they do for a living? What energy source could possibly power a Reality Distortion Field of that magnitude? The mind boggles.

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