Impress them with our prowess, do.

jimvanpelt indirectly mentioned a NYT article about how elite colleges were a buyer's market back in the day, when elite really meant elite. Harvard accepted nearly 90% of the students that sat the entrance exam in the 1860s, and they advertised pretty hard to attract students of the proper calibre. But the cool thing is the PDF of (part of) the 1869 Harvard entrance exam. Okay, they mailed it to you, so I presume it was sort of an open book untimed test. And obviously, the importance of the classics, geography, and classical geometry has dwindled. But still. I think Dr. Pookie and I working together might, might, conceivably qualify to be a college freshman.

Maybe atheists should hide themselves on campus after all

Because the mere sight of an atheist may drive normal people to injure themselves and attack the police.

The Shadows, Kith and Kin by Joe R. Lansdale

A collection of a handful of horrorish/fantasyish short stories by Lansdale. A couple of the better entries tie into the Dead in the West universe. I also really enjoyed "White Mule, Spotted Pig" -- more of a backwoods tall-tale. "Bill, the Little Steam Shovel" is a fun story, but I'd read it before, and it didn't grow on a re-read.